Feelings

Never mind I'll find someone like you,
I wish nothing but the best for you,
Don't forget me I beg,
I remember you said,
Sometimes it lasts in love,
But sometimes it hurts instead...

It is something personal, to share something like this. But I'm doing this because I need to get it out of my head, not to forget but as a reminder to my future self.

Remember how i said that i like someone, since i started my degree? Well, now the tenses had changed from LIKE to LIKED. You can see the differences, right?

Something happen along the way. We used to talk, like close friends who share the same crazy hobbies and interests. But then, just when i open up my heart to you, you became someone else that i don't know. You act like a stranger and drifted away. We became further apart. If i made a mistake, i'm sorry. Its just the way i am. I don't want to be someone i'm not. Maybe i was too honest in my actions, being overly excited when talking to you, and you don't like it, but that's just how i really feel towards you.

Now, you had finally told the truth. And i'm thankful for that. If only you told me sooner, i wouldn't have been this hopeful. Really i feel like an idiot. I should have seen this coming. Although a part of me still hopes that it was just a dream, i need to face reality. I need to move on, without you holding me back.

What were all those messages for? To whom are you referring? Were you not talking about me? You got my hopes up, and made me believe in a fantasy. But you crushed it all with a single blow.

My tears wasted on someone like you...

Dear Diary,
There's a few things that I wanted to let you know.
First of all, currently I'm in my degree years in a local uni. In second year, to be exact.
Secondly, I've moved up state. Away from my dear friends ;'(  but it's not so bad. Now, I can always return home every weekends (but not always since work is always a plenty)
Thirdly, classes is....idk. I can't seem to get my mind to concentrate T___T 
And everything else is same old, same old. Not much to talk about.

But, there is one teeny tiny little thing that I wanted to share~
I think I'm in L O * E!
Hehe~ (´∀｀)
With someone that's also in the same uni, same course, same year, but (sadly) not in the same class (well, just one class) And no, he doesn't know..
Do you notice, how in every comics that I've read, the hero is always so..oblivious? Like how ignorant can you be that you couldn't notice the girl's feelings? It's just so sad..and the saddest part is that, the guy in question is also like that.. I'm also to blame because I don't have the courage and I can't be honest. A friend of mine says it's ok to be like that. It makes us look..sweet? *sigh*
There is one problem..I'm not sure if it's admiration or something more. 
Only time will tell.
Hopefully, Lady Luck will be on my side ;')

Valentines come & go

I know, I know, Valentines Day was a few days ago. I was thinking of updating this that night, but didn't know what to right. So, I'm doing it now.


The reason that I'm doing this now was NOT because I was busy celebrating (mostly because I have no reason to celebrate since I don't have that special someone & the other reason was I had to work - yes people, I was working on a holiday - well, not considered a holiday here).


That night , while I was listening to soppy love songs on the radio, a memory came. It's something that I've never shared with anybody because it's kinda embarrassing for me. When someone asks me whether I've ever felt love, loved or loving towards someone, I always answered yes & no but never told what that meant.


Ok, here goes.
There's this guy that I just met & we talked a bit. He invited me to join his group & I did. We had fun as friends did. Then, suddenly he asked me to be his girlfriend. It was out of the blue. I was speechless. He said I was fun to be with & felt attracted to me. So, naturally I said, yeah why not. 


I've never felt anything like it before. You would probably say it was a first love, but I highly doubt it. The truth was, we only met virtually. Yup. That's right. We only talked through the web and never saw each other's faces. And to top it off, it only lasted a month. For a long time, I never heard from him again. I was mad at first & felt cheated, but then, I was grateful because I knew it would never last. 


So, yes, I had felt love before & no, it wasn't real.


To me, he was just a chapter in my life and not the entire book. (Hope this makes sense, LOL )

So sweet la you :)

Hee~
Sy nak update jugak mlm ni,
even though kepala gua dah pening2,
and my eyes are getting heavy...
Post ni about a verrrryy sweet brother and his sister.
p/s: It is NOT about anyone related to me, whether alive or no longer among the living.Ok.
This guy is one of the regulars and he usually comes with his sister.
But, oh my!
Dia sangat caring and he likes to smile a lot! 
That's a big bonus in my book.
Not sure how old he is though...
It makes me wish that I have a big brother like him.
Sadly, I don't.
Maybe, in another life?
Or not as a brother?
But someone very close..
Hehe~

Bersederhanalah

Hari ni xdpt balik rumah utk mkn,
So kena mkn kat restoran sebelah je.
I was very careful when choosing my "lauk" (lol, xingat dlm BI dia apa)
Tp masa nak byr,... PERGH!!!
Agak mahal la.
Nasib baik la cukup duit.
If not, who's gonna pay meh?
Rasa mcm dah cukup berjimat-cermat,
tp indah khabar dari rupa (sesuai ke peribahasa ni?)
Kalau nak diet, xpernah ikut pun.
So, xpayah ler...
Setakat ni tu je.
*Ceh, tu je nak tulis*
p/s: I'm writing this at my workplace. Bored.

Interesting day, yesterday

I just wanted to post this real quick since I have to work in a few mins.

What happened yesterday was quite interesting (like that title up there)

One of the customers was my lect. and I was so surprised that my mind went blank for a few seconds.

And for a while, I couldn't remember his name. So sorry sir.

And surprisingly, dia yang tegur dulu. Hehe. That's very nice of him.

But, he didn't remember my name. Well, duh. 

Another customer that made my day is also a guy.

At first, I thought he was hitting on me (LOL)

He kept asking me questions, asking my name & stuff...

But, then his true purpose was only to promote insurance (from an insurance company).

*Sigh*

I should have known better. 

Lol, funny day.

Who knows what might happen today.

Probably nothing. 

:)

Rindu tahap maksima!

I miss my best friends!

It's been so long since we get together.

Bila tengok dia have fun with someone else,

rasa mcm jealous. haha

Can't blame others, 

It's my own fault for not doing my best

to keep us together.

But how?

Sekadar messaging, fb-ing, 

mmg xcukup...

And, it's like, susah sgt nak jumpa

sbb dah tinggal berjauhan. 

Cewah :P

Dear me,

get a grip and pray that

she will not forget me

and always treasure our memories

like I always have.

I MISS YOU!!